Category: Uncategorized

  • “Gas, Grit, and Grease: The Rise of Breakfast Pizza”

    “Gas, Grit, and Grease: The Rise of Breakfast Pizza”

      Some revolutions don’t come with fanfare. They come with sausage and scrambled eggs baked onto dough, passed across a counter next to a stack of lottery tickets and a bottle of windshield washer fluid.

    Somewhere between Des Moines and nowhere, in a town stitched together by grain silos and family plots, Casey’s joined the great pizza debate. No press release. No rebranding campaign. Just a warm box, steam slipping out the corner, handed to you by someone who probably went to school with your cousin.

    It’s gas station pizza.

    But it’s also breakfast.

    And—maybe more surprising—it’s good.

    Really good.

    Casey’s didn’t ask for the spotlight. But in the vacuum left by Happy Joe’s—the once-beloved Midwest institution now hollowed out by corporate ownership—someone had to carry the flag. And who better than the corner store where people already stopped each morning? For gas. For coffee. For smokes. For a moment of stillness before the engine of the day kicks in.

    Add breakfast pizza to that mix, and you’re no longer just fueling your car. You’re feeding something more—something rooted in routine, in comfort, in community.

    This isn’t fast food. It’s small-town sustenance.

    The crust is soft but holds its weight. The cheese stretches like it’s proud of itself. The eggs—fluffy in a way that shouldn’t be possible from a gas station oven—mingle with sausage, bacon, and a whisper of gravy or ranch, depending on your luck or your location. And there’s something about eating it hot in your car, with the windows cracked, that makes it feel like a secret you didn’t know you needed.

    It’s not trying to be New York thin or Chicago deep. It’s not partisan. It’s not aspirational.

    It’s accessible. And in places long forgotten by the chains and the trendsetters, that matters.

    In these parts, you learn not to turn your nose up at a place just because it sells motor oil next to chicken wings. I’ve had some of the best-fried chicken of my life at a gas station where, for a while, they sold more legs and thighs than unleaded gasoline. The fryer was old, the breading was loud, and the line wrapped around the soda machine.

    The food wasn’t about food. It was about necessity turned into art, about making it work with what you’ve. That’s the ethic here. That’s what breakfast pizza at Casey’s represents—not just a meal, but a moment.

    And maybe that’s what makes it stick.

    Because when the big brands pack up and leave—when the last neon signs flicker out, and the downtown diner turns into a boarded-up memory—it’s places like Casey’s that stay. The ones that evolve without losing their soul. They understand people need something hot in the morning, something easy, something satisfying. Something theirs.

    So, yeah. Put Casey’s in the pizza conversation.

    Not because they outdid Brooklyn or outbaked Naples.

    But because they showed up for the Midwest.

    And sometimes, showing up is everything.

    By Kyle Hayes

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  • Bread and Memory: A Loaf, A Legacy

    Bread and Memory: A Loaf, A Legacy

    By Kyle J. Hayes

    Some smells don’t just linger—they haunt. Not in the way a ghost knocks a glass off a table, but in the way they slip beneath your skin, settle deep in your chest, and curl around your ribs like something half-remembered.

    For me, it’s bread.

    The scent of dough rising—warm, yeasty, patient—takes me back to a church that no longer smells like bread and a family that no longer lives above it. The first name I knew it by was “True Faith.” Later, it became Penson Temple Church of God in Christ, named after my great-grandfather, George Penson. It sat sturdy in Chicago, a place where Sundays were long and the sermons longer, but there was always a rhythm to it. Scripture, music, prayer… and the rising of bread.

    Upstairs, above that sanctuary, lived my grandparents. And on certain Sundays, before the Holy Ghost stirred the congregation, something else stirred first. A batch of dinner rolls, tucked under a clean towel, warming in the silence. The smell would drift down into the pews, enveloping the base of the pulpit, blending with the scent of lemon polish and the aroma of old hymnals. And somehow, in that mingling, the church felt even more sacred.

    That recipe is gone now. Nobody wrote it down. Nobody learned it.

    We lose it to time, just as we lose so many things we assume will always be there. We didn’t think to ask, or we didn’t know it mattered. And now, when I bake bread, I am not trying to recreate it exactly. I know I never will. What I am doing is chasing a feeling. Trying to knead memory into flour, water, and salt. Trying to bring back the ghost of a moment I didn’t know I needed to preserve.

    In that pursuit, I’ve learned more than I expected. About precision. About patience. About what happens when you try to rush something sacred.

    And I found this recipe—a humble, sturdy loaf. Nothing fancy. Just good sandwich bread. The kind that makes you feel like the house is full, even when it’s not.

    My Favorite Sandwich Bread Recipe:

    • 350g (1.5 cups) warm water
    • 3g (1 tsp) instant yeast
    • 530g (4 1/4 cups) bread flour
    • 12g (1 tbsp) sugar
    • 20g (1 1/2 tbsp) olive oil
    • 125g (2/3 cup) ripe poolish or sourdough starter
    • 11g (2 tsp) salt

    To Make the Poolish (Preferment):

    • 65g (about 1/2 cup) bread flour
    • 65g (about 1/4 cup) water (room temperature)
    • A pinch of Active Dry yeast
    1. In a small bowl, combine the flour, water, and yeast.
    2. Stir until the ingredients are fully incorporated into a smooth, wet dough.
    3. Cover loosely with plastic wrap or a clean towel.
    4. Let sit at room temperature for 24 hours or until bubbly and fragrant.

    Once your poolish is ready, use 125g (about 2/3 cup) of it in the recipe above.

    Instructions for the Dough:

    1. Combine all ingredients in the bowl of a stand mixer with a dough hook. Mix on low for 3 minutes until just combined.
    2. Increase to high and mix for an additional 6 minutes until smooth and elastic. (To mix by hand, knead vigorously on a floured surface.)
    3. Place the dough into a bowl, cover it, and let it rise at room temperature for 2 hours.
    4. After 30 minutes, do a strength-building fold. Cover.
    5. After another 30 minutes (1 hour into rise), repeat the fold.
    6. Let rise for the remaining hour.

    Prepare a 13″x4″x4″ Pullman loaf pan by oiling it with olive oil or butter.

    1. Turn the dough out onto a floured surface and gently de-gas it with your fingertips.
    2. Shape into loaf and place seam-side down in Pullman pan.
    3. Cover and let the dough rise for 1 hour or until it has reached 3/4 of the height of the pan.
    4. If using the lid, slide it on before baking. If baking uncovered, lightly score the top of the cake.
    5. Bake at 425°F (218°C) for 40-45 minutes. Remove the lid after 35 minutes if the top is covered and brown.

    Cool completely before slicing.

    The bread will speak for itself. But it will also say more if you let it.

    It might remind you of a kitchen you haven’t stood in since you were eight. Of someone who made space for you in a world that didn’t. Of a church that held both gospel and gluten.

    I bake to remember. I bake to reclaim. I bake because the world is loud, but bread rises in silence.

    And sometimes, that silence smells like home.

    By Kyle J. Hayes

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  • A Reflection on the Loss of a Pioneer

    A Reflection on the Loss of a Pioneer

    Today, Sly Stone passed away. And the world doesn’t sound the same.

    They’ll write the obituaries. They’ll tell you about the hits—Everyday PeopleThank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin) If You Want Me to Stay—and they’ll remind you that Sly and the Family Stone broke barriers: Black and white, male and female, gospel and funk, radical and joyful. But the truth is, you can’t really write Sly down. You have to feel him. You have to let the bassline wrap around your ribs, and the distortion melts into the marrow of your spine. You have to live inside the chaos of his sound to understand what he meant.

    Because Sly didn’t just make music. He reshaped it. He cracked it open and poured revolution into it.

    Before Prince danced across purple stages in high-heeled boots, before he blurred gender and genius in a swirl of falsetto and fire, there was Sly—funk’s wild architect. The Black man with a perm and a prophet’s pen, who wrote soul anthems that doubled as sermons, who saw the future and tried to drag the rest of us toward it, even as it tore at him. Prince stood on the edge of the genre. Sly obliterated it. Rock, soul, funk, psychedelia—he didn’t choose. He claimed them all.

    But unlike Prince, Sly never won the war for his music.

    While Prince famously scribbled “slave” on his cheek and fought Warner Bros. in the spotlight, Sly’s battle was quieter and crueler. He lost ownership of his music early and, with it, a piece of himself. The industry chewed him up like it’s done to so many brilliant Black creators—those who saw something holy in rhythm and melody, only to be left with shadows and unpaid royalties.

    And then there were the drugs.

    Sly fought them like a man wading through water that got deeper with every step. Cocaine, PCP, the ghosts of genius, and pressure and pain. His band fell apart. His voice changed. The clarity in his music faded. And yet… even in the haze, there were sparks. Small TalkHigh on YouI heard, ‘Ya Missed Me; Well, I’m Back.‘ But the world had already started turning its head, already writing him off. And that is the tragedy. Because Sly Stone never stopped being brilliant—he just stopped being what the world wanted brilliance to look like.

    We’ve lost so many of our giants this way.

    Lost them not just in death but in the way they were discarded while alive. Donny, Curtis, Rick, Whitney, MJ, Aretha, and now Sly. Black music—our music, foundational Black American music—has always been the soul of this nation. And yet, it’s often treated like a trend: celebrated, consumed, and forgotten. Those artists built the walls of American sound. Brick by brick. Note by note. And now, those walls feel emptier.

    So I ask: Who carries the torch now?

    Who sings not just with talent but with conviction? Who dares to blend funk and message, to stand against the industry instead of smiling for the cover photo? Who speaks truth to power in rhythm and melody and lets their voice sound imperfecturgentand human?

    I’m not sure if the next Sly is out there. Maybe we should stop looking for replacements and start remembering the ones we lost—fully. Honestly. Mess and all.

    Sly Stone was more than a funk legend. He was a sound—a movement trapped in vinyl, a spirit screaming through wah-wah pedals and gospel-soaked harmonies. He was the bridge between chaos and groove, between revolution and radio. And today, that bridge is gone.

    Rest in Peace, Brother Sly.

    You never needed permission to change the world.

    You just did it.

    By Kyle J. Hayes

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  • Our Music: The Beginning and the End

    Our Music: The Beginning and the End

    A Meditation on Soul, Sound, and the Ghosts That Sing Through Us

    When I was a boy, like most Black children raised in America, I laughed when Africa was mentioned. Not because it was funny but because we had been taught to laugh. Conditioned to see our origin not as a source of pride but as a place of backwardness. What the media didn’t mock outright, it rendered invisible. So, we were left to fill the void with jokes, half-truths, and cartoon images of loincloths and drums. The continent became abstract. It became distant. It became everything but ours.

    But as I grew, so did my questions. And the laughter gave way to a different kind of sound—the sound of knowing.

    We began to ask: When did our music begin? Where did it come from? What did we create in the spaces where even language had been stolen? The answers don’t live in textbooks or museum plaques. They live in the air. They live in the hum of our grandmother’s voice as she cleans. In the moan of a man dragging his feet after twelve hours on the line. In the drumless beat that lived in our throats when all else had been taken.

    Our music began in the fields. Not in studios. Not in arenas. Not even in churches. It started under the weight of cotton, under the eye of the overseer, under the crack of the lash.

    It began as moaning—deep, wordless, and primal. It was the closest thing to prayer many of us could manage. Because to pray, you need hope. And for the enslaved, hope was dangerous. So, instead, we sang.

    We sang to stay sane. We sang to stay human. We sang to stay alive.

    From those field hollers came the roots of something uniquely ours. The Blues.

    They called it the devil’s music. But what they didn’t say is that the devil they feared was the truth. Because the Blues told it. The Blues didn’t pretend. It didn’t cause pain. It set it to a twelve-bar pattern and let it breathe. It made grief rhythmic. It gave loneliness structure. It turned absence into presence.

    This was not Europe’s music. This was not borrowed. This was born. Born from people who had no instruments, so they became them. Born from people who had no nation, so they made one out of sound. Born from people who had every reason to be silent and still found a way to sing.

    We called it the Blues, but it was more than that. It was a ledger of loss. It was oral scripture. It was our way of remembering in a country that told us to forget.

    From the Blues came Soul.

    Not a genre. A declaration.

    You have to understand that Soul wasn’t invented. It was revealed. It was the sound of field songs baptized in Gospel that fed on the Blues and was set loose in cities that never fully welcomed us.

    You can hear it in Sam Cooke’s croon, in Aretha’s roar, in Curtis Mayfield’s quiet thunder. Soul was not about being smooth or marketable. It was about being seen letting the full, ungovernable weight of our joy and heartbreak crash through speakers that once filtered our pain.

    And even then—even at its height—they tried to soften it. To sand down its edges. To make it palatable. Because America has always loved Black music more than it has loved Black people.

    And so came the theft.

    They stole our sound, dressed it in pale skin, and sold it back to us. They took our rawness and gave it polish. Took our sorrow and gave it a spin. They called it rock ‘n’ roll. They called it pop. They called it American.

    They rarely called it Black.

    Our music was repackaged, rerouted, and rendered safe for suburban ears. The Gospel in it muted. The struggle was silenced. What had been born in the crucible of bondage became elevator music. What once carried the weight of chains became background noise for shopping malls.

    And we are supposed to be grateful for the exposure.

    And now, there is another kind of theft creeping in—a quieter one but no less insidious.

    There is a growing chorus of voices from the continent claiming that the musical expressions born in the cotton fields, juke joints, and The Black churches of the American South were not the creations of Foundational Black Americans but rather extensions of African traditions. They say we borrowed our harmonies, our rhythms, our Soul from ancestral roots. And while it is true that rhythm and spiritual depth traveled with us across the Atlantic, what was built here—in the ashes of slavery, in the belly of Jim Crow, in the shadow of redlining—was ours.

    Our music did not evolve in the warm circle of communal drum fires but in the cold silence of forced labor. It did not grow in celebratory dance but in whispered prayer. It was not handed down intact. It was reconstructed from what could be remembered, imagined, and reshaped under duress.

    To say that the Blues is African is to ignore that it was birthed in chains. To say that Soul came from African rhythms is to forget that those rhythms were not allowed to survive intact here.

    The Blues, jazz, Gospel, Soul, hip-hop—these are not direct imports. They are American creations born from the suffering, resilience, and genius of Black Americans. They are ours.

    And now, Hollywood has found a way to tell it back to us. The movie Sinners speaks of the Blues. It drapes the sound in story, in mystery, in the supernatural. It shows the music as a kind of bridge—between generations, between pain and healing, between this life and the next.

    It is not perfect. But it touches something real.

    Because we know—and have always known—that our music is spiritual. Not just in the religious sense. Spiritual as in sacred. Spiritual as in bound to something greater than survival.

    Our music remembers. It remembers those who never had names. It remembers those who disappeared. It remembers what textbooks omitted, what whitewashed museums refuse to say.

    The Blues isn’t just music. It’s mourning. Soul isn’t just rhythm. It’s reclamation.

    There is no true beginning to our music. Because we didn’t arrive here in silence.

    We brought rhythm in our footsteps. We brought the song in our mouths. And when they tried to beat it out of us, we built it back louder.

    And there is no end. Because we are still singing. Still sampling. Still remixing memory.

    You can hear it in Kendrick Lamar’s fury. In D’Angelo’s whispers. In the rasp of Brittany Howard. In every young artist who refuses to let the culture be flattened.

    We don’t need monuments. We have melody.

    We don’t need permission. We have a voice.

    And when we are gone, the music will still be here. Singing the names of those who were never called. Humming the history no one else wanted to write. Telling the truth in a language that can’t be stolen.

    We did not bring instruments. We became them. And we will not go quietly.

    By Kyle J. Hayes

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  • Where Are the Heroes?

    Where Are the Heroes?

    A Meditation on What We’ve Lost

    I don’t know when it started. Maybe it was gradual and subtle, like a dimming light you don’t notice until the room is too dark to read by. But one day, I looked around at the screens that raised our children and couldn’t find the heroes.

    I began to notice it with The Boys. It is a show about heroes—but not really. It is a world where the ones with power are most corrupted by it. Where valor is theater, morality is performance, and saviors are mostly just men in costume pretending not to be monsters.

    Then came Spider-Man: No Way Home. A young man with a heart too big for his world, Peter Parker chooses to save even the villains and believes in redemption when the world screams for retribution. In doing so, he loses everything: his aunt, friends, and identity.

    He chooses to be good—and the price is silence, exile, and anonymity.

    Then there’s Invincible, which doesn’t even pretend to be kind. A coming-of-age wrapped in trauma and blood. Where the father figure is a god-turned-murderer, and the son is taught that the universe does not care about kindness. Where hope feels like a joke told too late at a funeral.

    They tell us these shows are for adults like Family GuyFuturamaand The Simpsons. But they don’t say this: these shows raise children too. And in their worlds, good is outdated. Noble is naive. Heroism is a mask we wear until it no longer serves us.

    When I was young, our heroes were loud. They didn’t ask for nuance. They exploded onto the screen with muscles and missions: Rambo, Chuck Norris, Axel Foley, John McClane. They weren’t perfect, but they were good.

    They stood for something.

    Even in their flaws, they modeled something to reach for. Courage. Loyalty. Sacrifice.

    The soldiers we looked up to weren’t broken men with body counts and vendettas. The cops weren’t corrupt antiheroes buried in procedural nihilism. They were flawed, certainly, but they fought for what was right. And they usually won.

    Now we give our children John Wick—a grieving assassin. Mr. Nobody—a retired government killer with nothing to lose. Deadpool—a mercenary with jokes sharper than his morals.

    They are cool. They are dangerous. But they are not heroes.

    Maybe that’s the lesson. Being a hero doesn’t guarantee success. That goodness is impractical. That mercy gets you killed.

    Evil lived in Sinners (and yes, it was beautiful in its own right). The vampires survived. The message buried beneath symbolism and song is that light doesn’t always win.

    And maybe that’s true. But what do we do with truth when it wounds the spirit?

    What happens to a child raised on stories where every savior falls? What happens to a generation who watches the world through screens that whisper: no one is coming to help you. Everyone is broken. Do what you must.

    I know someone will say, “Heroes still exist. Look to real life.” And yes, there are firefighters, soldiers, teachers, nurses, and parents. But these heroes are buried beneath algorithms, drowned in the noise. Their stories don’t stream on prime time, and their morals aren’t trending.

    And while they live, they are rarely seen.

    But the most painful betrayal comes not from stories in which heroes fall but from stories in which heroes are rewritten.

    Marvel took perhaps the greatest heroic sacrifice in modern cinema—the death of Tony Stark, Iron Man, in Avengers: Endgame. A moment that defined selflessness, courage, and the idea that doing the right thing often costs everything.

    And now, they are planning to bring him back—Robert Downey Jr.—not as Iron Man, not as the man who saved the universe, but as Doctor Doom.

    From savior to villain. From selfless to sinister.

    They will say it’s storytelling. They will say it’s a multiverse. They will say it’s fiction.

    But they are really erasing memory, replacing the legacy of heroism with the ambiguity of moral inversion. In doing so, they are telling a new story to a generation already unsure of what good looks like.

    What hope do we have if Iron Man can be undone and his sacrifice rewritten?

    So, I write this not just as a lament but as a question:

    What does it mean to raise children in a world with no heroes?

    What do we ask of the imagination when every tale ends in blood? What do we feed the soul when victory is reserved only for those who betray the light?

    Because I still believe in the power of a story. I still believe in the need for something to reach for.

    I fear we are telling our sons and daughters that goodness is outdated, honor is inconvenient, and heroism is a lie the world no longer has room for.

    And if that is the case, then we have failed.

    Not just to inspire. But to believe.

    By Kyle J. Hayes

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  • U2’s The Joshua Tree: When Pop Music Reached for Something Higher

    U2’s The Joshua Tree: When Pop Music Reached for Something Higher

    It’s not supposed to feel this deep. It’s pop. It’s not supposed to carry this much weight, not supposed to stir this much longing. Pop is supposed to be light. Easy. Disposable. Something you hum along to in the car, something that moves through you without leaving a mark.

    No one told U2 that.

    Or maybe they knew, and they simply refused to obey the rules.

    Because The Joshua Tree isn’t just pop. It’s a landscape. It’s atmosphere. It is wide-open spaces and desert highways, rolling thunder, and quiet reckoning. It does what great music is supposed to do—it makes you feel and think, and it does both before you even realize it’s happening.

    And maybe that’s why this pop album hits harder than it has any right to.

    Something is aching in Where the Streets Have No Name. In the way, Bono sings like he’s searching for something just out of reach, something desperate in how the guitars shimmer and build.

    Then comes I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For.

    Suddenly, the album no longer feels like pop.

    This is something else—something rooted in tradition, something older than the rock itself. This is gospel. The way the chords rise, and the choir sweeps in behind Bono’s voice is unmistakable. And not gospel in the sense of imitation, but gospel in spirit. This is the sound of yearning, the sound of faith wrapped in doubt, the sound of a man lifting his hands toward heaven even as his feet stay planted firmly on the ground.

    And that’s the brilliance of The Joshua Tree.

    Because it reflects the ’80s—the tension, the longing, the searching—it reflects America through outsiders’ eyes, seeing its promise and brokenness. It demonstrates the feelings people don’t always talk about—the spiritual exhaustion, the weight of time, the quiet, relentless ache of wanting more but not knowing exactly what more is.

    And that’s what makes The Joshua Tree great.

    Because it is pop, yes. But it’s also something more profound. Something truer.

    Something that reaches.

    And thank God nobody told them otherwise.

    By Kyle J. Hayes

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    #U2 #TheJoshuaTree #MusicAsResistance #AlbumReflection #RockHistory #EchoVerseNarratives

  • So It’s Me and Cake Again

    So It’s Me and Cake Again

    A Reflection on Pound Cake, Memory, and Soul

    There’s something quiet and personal about returning to a kitchen after a small failure. You remember the last time—how it crumbled, how you forgot the parchment, how it fell apart before it ever came together. But you also remember the taste, the intention, and the lesson. That’s where this began.

    So it’s me and cake again. But this time, I kept it simple: a pound cake, humble in name but rich in history. I didn’t chase complexity—I honored instinct. I moved with the memory of what went wrong last time and the hope that this time, it might go right. It’s not perfect. It’s just real.

    I made adjustments, measured the flour carefully, lined the pans, and whispered thanks to the ancestors. I didn’t use anything fancy—just what I had. And that, I imagine, is exactly how it began generations ago. Our people didn’t bake from abundance; they baked from necessity, love, and spirit—from what was on hand. And somehow, what they made was enough—sometimes more than enough.

    This time, I tasted the batter and had to pause. It was everything: smooth, sweet, gently spiced with nutmeg and cinnamon, lifted with a little lemon. It was the kind of batter that made you wonder why we even bother baking it at all. I almost didn’t—almost just sat at the counter with a spoon and a smile.

    But I finished it. I poured it into the pan, slid it into the oven, and let the scent remind me who I am.

    When it came out—cracked top, deep golden edges—I knew I’d done something right, not just in the measurements, but in the meaning. I had baked something that nodded back to the past while standing firm in the present. I made a cake with my hands, memory, and heart.

    It wasn’t about impressing anyone. It was about honoring where I come from—a kitchen without frills, a recipe born of survival, a dessert passed down not through written cards but through repetition, rhythm, and watching someone you love beat butter and sugar until it sang.

    That’s what soul food really is. It’s not the trending dishes on Instagram. It’s the small, sacred rituals in quiet kitchens. It’s using what you have and turning it into something worthy of memory. It’s the story inside the bite.

    So yes—it’s me and cake again. And this time, I came correct. Not because I had to prove anything but because I remembered what matters: presence, patience, and the power of making something from nothing.

    This cake?

    It’s more than dessert.

    It’s inheritance.

    It’s healing.

    It’s home.

    Want the recipe I used?

    Let me know in the comments or subscribe below.

    By Kyle J. Hayes

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  • A Place to Sit Still: Birthday Reflections, Burgers, and Becoming Social Again

    A Place to Sit Still: Birthday Reflections, Burgers, and Becoming Social Again

    Last night, I went out.

    Not on the day of, my birthday had come and gone, as I’d hoped it would, quiet and unbothered.

    But I’ve learned that the people in my life now don’t take kindly to silence.

    They don’t take “I’m okay” at face value.

    They don’t let me disappear the way I used to.

    So, a few days later, they pulled me out—not with pressure, but with presence.

    Another group of close friends who’ve decided they’re going to keep me in the light,

    even when I’ve learned to find safety in the shade.

    It wasn’t a big thing.

    It never has to be.

    Just a dinner.

    An excuse to wear something better than the soft armor of sweats and a hoodie.

    A reason to put on real pants, brush off the nice watch, and step into the world looking like someone ready to be seen,

    even if he isn’t.

    We went to BJ’s Brewhouse.

    Not my spot—but close enough.

    A place I’ve been to before, one of the few I feel okay in.

    Large, yes. Public, yes.

    But somehow, it doesn’t feel like a spotlight.

    It feels like a corner where you can sit, breathe, eat, and maybe even laugh a little.

    One of the things I’ve always noticed—and quietly appreciated—is how BJ’s handles space.

    Most places cater to the groups.

    The couples.

    The table-for-fours and “Is anyone else joining you?” assumptions.

    But BJ’s?

    They’ve got single tables.

    Not shoved at the bar.

    Not wedged between a high chair and the kitchen swing doors.

    Actual tables—small, functional, intentional.

    They don’t ask why you’re alone.

    They just let you be.

    I can’t explain how rare that is.

    Because when you’re out alone, you don’t just carry solitude.

    You carry other people’s stares.

    The suspicion. The pity. The questions.

    BJ’s doesn’t give you any of that.

    They just give you a seat.

    And sometimes, that’s all a person really needs.

    The staff?

    Cheerful, engaging—yes.

    But never intrusive.

    The kind of servers who know when to smile and when to simply refill your water without breaking the spell of conversation.

    That matters more than people know.

    In Albuquerque, we have breweries like some places have churches—on every corner, every flavor, and every crowd.

    But BJ’s holds its own.

    I don’t drink much.

    Just a light beer to prime the taste buds,

    to keep the appetite sharp, not spoiled.

    Something to mark the occasion without blurring it.

    I ordered the jalapeño burger.

    Spice sharp enough to remind me I’m still alive.

    Messy enough to keep things grounded.

    A good burger doesn’t pretend.

    It tells the truth.

    And this one did.

    After that came the brownie.

    Chocolate. Dense. Almost obscene in its richness.

    One of those desserts that makes you pause halfway through—not because you’re full,

    but because you need a moment to respect it.

    It was indulgent.

    And it was perfect.

    We ate. We talked.

    I laughed more than I expected to.

    And in the low hum of that restaurant, surrounded by people who insisted I still belonged to the world,

    I felt something I hadn’t felt in a while:

    Comfort.

    Not the kind you fake for other people.

    The real kind.

    The kind that says you don’t have to perform here.

    My old spot closed a while ago.

    The place I used to go when I wanted to be alone but not lonely.

    The place where the servers knew me, and I knew the menu by heart.

    When that door shut for good, I stopped going out.

    But maybe—just maybe-I ‘ve found a new one.

    Not because it’s perfect.

    But it makes space for people like me.

    People who don’t always feel right in crowds.

    People who sometimes need a small table and a quiet corner to feel human again.

    It’s not just about the food.

    It never was.

    It’s about finding a place in the world where you can exist as you are—

    birthday or not.

    By Kyle Hayes

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  • Anywhere but Nowhere: On Driving While Black in the Land of the Free

    Anywhere but Nowhere: On Driving While Black in the Land of the Free

    I own a nice vehicle.

    The kind that hugs the road like a whisper and hums like it knows where it’s going.

    It’s the kind of SUV that should be free.

    Built for long stretches of empty highway and distant horizons.

    But it sits mostly still.

    It idles in the garage.

    It moves through town and back,

    But not out there.

    Not far.

    Because while it can take me anywhere, I go nowhere,

    the country will not let me forget who I am while driving.

    I used to move without worry.

    Back when I was younger, maybe more foolish, perhaps just more free.

    Back when I’d take off cross-country with nothing but a map, a CD wallet, and a crooked smile.

    I didn’t think twice about what county I was in, or whose land I was rolling through.

    But age teaches you what experience doesn’t let you forget.

    It teaches you that being a Black man in a nice car is still a flag.

    Still a reason to be stopped.

    Still a reason to be questioned.

    Still a reason to be followed, harassed, or worse—disappeared.

    I’ve had the thoughts.

    You know the ones.

    What happens if I stop in the wrong place?

    What if I need gas in the wrong town?

    What if I pull over in the wrong stretch of highway with no shoulder or witnesses?

    What if I encounter a police officer who feels like proving a point?

    What if they plant something?

    What if I reach too fast?

    What if I say too little or too much?

    What if I’m told to get out of the car and don’t make it to the next sentence?

    These aren’t dramatic hypotheticals.

    These are possibilities.

    Probabilities, even.

    Because Black freedom in America has always come with asterisks.

    Because a license and registration don’t mean much when fear enters the room.

    Because we still live in a country where a Black man in a nice car is a contradiction that law enforcement wants to solve.

    And this fear isn’t new.

    It’s passed down.

    Inherited like a scar.

    In another era, we had something called the Negro Motorist Green Book.

    A quiet lifeline printed on pulp and ink.

    A book of safe places—if any such place ever existed.

    Gas stations where you wouldn’t be chased off with a shotgun.

    Hotels where you could sleep without looking over your shoulder.

    Restaurants where you’d be served a plate and not a stare.

    It was more than a travel guide.

    It was a Black atlas for survival.

    And now I find myself decades later, carrying the same questions in my gut.

    Wondering how far I can go before someone decides I’ve gone too far.

    Sometimes I wonder if it’s paranoia.

    If I’m being unreasonable.

    If I’ve let the headlines and hashtags shape my fear.

    But then I remember names.

    Not just George or Philando or Sandra.

    But names that never made the news.

    Names whispered in family kitchens.

    Stories told with sighs.

    Cousins who had “bad encounters.”

    Uncles who came home changed.

    It’s not paranoia if it keeps happening.

    It’s not irrational if the system was built this way.

    So I fly.

    I fly because in the sky, I have less chance of becoming another roadside ghost.

    I fly because TSA might be annoying but rarely ends in blood.

    I fly because the badge at the gate doesn’t come with a gun and a grudge.

    Still, the road calls me.

    Still, there’s something sacred about the open highway.

    Something spiritual about Black movement—unfettered, unapologetic, unbothered.

    That may be why I downloaded a new app today.

    A modern Green Book.

    A map of safe stops, safe places, safe Black-owned spaces.

    It may be enough.

    Maybe not.

    But I want to believe again.

    I want to believe that freedom can exist beyond my driveway.

    Because a car that can go anywhere

    deserves a country where that promise is true.

    And so do I.

    By Kyle Hayes

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    #DrivingWhileBlack #ModernGreenBook #BlackMobility #FreedomAndFear #BlackVoicesMatter

  • The Echo I Didn’t Expect: Kendrick, Taylor, and the Sound Between the Lines

    The Echo I Didn’t Expect: Kendrick, Taylor, and the Sound Between the Lines

    First, let me say this plainly: I am a Kendrick Lamar fan.

    Not the surface kind.

    Not the playlist kind.

    The kind who listens to the whole album, in order,

    Who waits for the videos.

    Who digs through lyrics like scripture, pausing, rewinding, sitting with bars like they were written for my memory alone.

    His music has never been just music to me.

    It’s been diagnosis.

    It’s been a protest.

    It’s been a mirror, cracked and shaking, but still reflecting something I needed to see.

    So when the Great Rap War of 2024 came like thunder,

    I stayed close.

    Not just for the spectacle, but for the weight.

    Because when Kendrick Lamar enters a war of words, it’s never just a diss.

    It’s a dissection.

    One night, long after the storm passed and the silence settled, I chased ghosts on YouTube.

    The way one does when sleep won’t come, and the truth is still humming in the walls.

    And there I stumbled across something unexpected:

    A page by Anthony Aiken Jr. (youtube.com/@AnthonyAikenJr).

    What he offered wasn’t commentary—it was archaeology.

    He unearthed not just Kendrick’s lyrics but their architecture, the cultural echoes, and one thing I never saw coming:

    Taylor Swift.

    Let me confess: I had never made that connection.

    In my world, Taylor Swift lived somewhere else.

    Somewhere, polished, pink, and distant from the cracked pavement where Kendrick built his kingdom.

    But Aiken pulled threads I hadn’t noticed.

    Lebron. Kendrick. Taylor.

    At first, it felt strange.

    Then it started to feel inevitable.

    So I did what I always do when I’m unsure,

    I listened.

    I started with a song Aiken mentioned: “Lavender Haze.”

    And I’ll be honest, I did not expect what I heard.

    What I expected was gloss.

    What I got was atmosphere.

    What I expected was pop.

    What I got was texture.

    Buried in the haze was a name I recognized, Sounwave.

    The sonic architect behind so much of Kendrick’s world.

    And there, floating above the fog of synth and softness, was Sam Dew,

    his voice cutting through like a whisper you didn’t know you needed until it arrived.

    In that moment, Taylor Swift wasn’t just Taylor Swift.

    She was something else.

    She was connected.

    It’s easy to draw lines between artists when the culture insists on fences.

    When the industry tells us who belongs to which genre, who speaks for what struggle, and who owns which sound.

    But music doesn’t obey boundaries.

    It bleeds.

    And if Kendrick taught me anything, it’s to listen deeper.

    Not just for bars.

    But for buried intention.

    So I kept listening.

    And I will keep listening.

    Not because I’m suddenly a Swiftie,

    but because I now know she is a lyricist.

    And if I missed this, what else have I missed?

    There’s a lesson in all this: something about staying open,

    about not letting genre, fame, or image keep you from recognizing truth when it sings.

    Because somewhere between Mr. Morale and Midnights,

    between “Not Like Us” and “Lavender Haze,”

    It is a space I didn’t know I needed,

    a space where craft speaks louder than category.

    So I’ll start again.

    Just like I do with every Kendrick album.

    Because meaning isn’t always found on the first listen.

    Sometimes it waits for you in the haze.

    By Kyle J. Hayes

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